A letter for the future (hopefully a long way away)

Jovi,
I want you to know something just in case you need it.

I lost my dad, your gpa, when I was 23. Even though he had seen me graduate high school, left me at college, and walked me down the aisle, I still feel like I lost him way too soon. He never got to hold you…or any of your siblings.(if we get to that). He never got to see you smile.

I know that he would love you more than you can imagine, and even though he never met you I know he still loves you.  The day that I get to tell you about him is a day I dread and look forward to. It’ll be hard for me to talk about him in the past tense but I’m excited for you to get to know him.

Now to my point. I want you to know how much I love you. In the case you have to deal with my exit from your life I want you to have the words I wish I had.

I want you to know that on every big day, I’ll be there.

On every special day, I’ll be there.

On sad days, I’ll be there.

On days that all you need is encouragement, I’ll be there.

On the days you just need someone to talk to, I’ll be there.

I’ll be there. If not in person, I will be in spirit.

If I go too early, it will be the right time. You’ll have days when you think about me and you’ll have days when you don’t. There may be tears or maybe even laughs. But, sweet girl, carry on. Don’t be afraid of life without me. You’ll be fine. Keep your head up and live your life. Smile, laugh, and love. Live.

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